A.C. Slater? No, silly! A Clean Slate!

In my various blog readings, I came across this passage written by The Suburban Minimalist:

Sometimes I think that all this de-cluttering is just an extension of my desire to always start over, leave the muddled past behind, and go forth into perfection.

I love it.  I love it because it is me.  Whenever I clean things out of my house, I feel a weight lifted off my shoulders.  I feel free, less burdened, like I have wiped the proverbial slate clean.  I love starting over, starting fresh, starting anew.  Maybe this minimalist plunge is about the ultimate clean slate.  When my life is free of any and all clutter, I can then add back only what I want.

The Five Year Plan Revisited

I wanted to revisit yesterday’s post.  I think I may have missed Miss M’s point (this tends to happen to me a lot – please get used to it – I have!).  I think her and Mr. Babatua of zen habits have the same idea, but I understood it better when Mr. Babatua explained it here in his post entitled “The Best Goal is No Goal”:

What do you do, then? Lay around on the couch all day, sleeping and watching TV and eating Ho-Hos? No, you simply do. You find something you’re passionate about, and do it. Just because you don’t have goals doesn’t mean you do nothing — you can create, you can produce, you can follow your passion.

And in practice, this is a wonderful thing: you wake up and do what you’re passionate about.

Perhaps this is another way to look at it:  Have you ever heard the expression “Life is a journey, not a destination”?  Maybe what Miss M and Mr. Babatua are trying to say is that the goal is the destination, and thus not the point of it all.  And maybe the passion is the journey.  As long as you are passionate about what you do everyday, then where you end up isn’t important.  Who needs a five year plan when every day is filled with what you want to be doing right then?  You will have lived passionately.  And who could ask for more than that?  I think this quote sums it up well:

“Don’t ask yourself what the world needs. Ask yourself what makes you come alive, and go do that, because what the world needs is people who have come alive.”     ~Howard Thurman

That’s my (non)goal: to do what makes me come alive.  And right now?  Today?  I think I did pretty well.

A Practical Question

Here I am starting with Miss Minimalist again!

In this post, Miss M put up a picture of a beautiful bedroom (source: Apartment Therapy):

I love it.  I can imagine waking up after a restful night’s sleep to the sea breezes coming in the open window (even though the apartment appears to be in a city – whatever).  But here’s my question.  Where does one put one’s alarm clock?

Seriously – that’s what I want to know!

I’ve since looked at many pictures of minimalist bedrooms, and love the look of a simple bed with no nightstands around it to clutter the room.  But really – where does one put an alarm clock?  It would look silly and a little “my first apartment” to put in on the floor.  Plus, I’m blind without my glasses and wouldn’t be able to read the thing!  So really, where does the alarm clock go?

5 Year Plan? I Want a 5 Year Plan!

In my various minimalist readings, I came across a post by Miss Minimalist about drifting like clouds and flowing like water.  And I think I might have to disagree with her on her theme for the post.  Here’s an excerpt:

I want to live my “real life” the same way. Sometimes I think there’s much too emphasis on setting goals and planning futures and reaching milestones. Why not simply enjoy life, instead of creating additional stress? I’m not against having aspirations; but to be honest, I don’t want to schedule my life on my iPod, download productivity apps, or attend virtual workshops on how to be successful at x, y, or z. And I certainly don’t want to create a five-year plan and mark my progress each step along the way.

Instead, I’d like to approach life the same way I approach travel—simply taking each day as it comes. I want to be surprised and delighted by what transpires, rather than ticking off a series of planned events. Mostly, however, I want the freedom to “wander” without the burden of possessions and responsibilities. That’s primarily my motivation for living a minimalist lifestyle; by keeping my “baggage” and “itinerary” as light as possible, I hope “to drift like clouds and flow like water” each day of my life.

Now, I may be barking up the wrong tree, but one of my goals for minimizing the clutter in both my home and my brain is to make way for the bigger goals and desires that aren’t currently being addressed in my life.  I once read an article* (sorry, can’t find the link now, I’ll look more for it tomorrow) about a woman who, as a junior in high school, visited an apartment in a Manhattan neighborhood and fell in love.  With a style of apartment.  Everything she did, from that moment on, was to get her closer to living at that address.  From the colleges she applied to, the friends she made, and the jobs she took after college, every decision she made was weighed with the exclusive scale of “will this get me closer to that apartment.”  (Whether basing your life around an apartment is a good plan is a different argument all together, as the author goes to to explore) And right now, the place where I’m currently at, the thing I’m looking for, is that drive.  That’s what all this is about:  giving myself the time and permission to peel back the layers to discover exactly what I want.  To figure out my purpose in life.  And create a plan to get there.  To devote myself entirely and selfishly (if necessary) to attain it.

Just one small thing: I don’t know how to do it.

But I’ll get there.  I’ll figure it out.  Maybe the two paths that I’m on aren’t even connected.  Maybe cleaning out my house is a method of procrastination on my part, and not a way of getting closer to my true self.  It probably is come to think of it.  But, it’s the path I’m on at the moment, and hey, my house is looking  a lot neater these days, so I’ll just keep on keeping on.

Oh, and Miss Minimalist, I’m very sorry the first time I mentioned your blog I was questioning your post.  I’m totally in love with your blog.  You are a talented writer.  I’m slowly working my way through your archives and particular like this post, as well as this one and this one.  And many more.

*I found the article.  It’s by Meghan Daum, is titled “My Misspent Youth”, and can be found here.

Update: Since posting this I have thought a lot about what Miss Minimalist said and have done additional reading on the topic.  If you’re interested in my evolving thoughts, please see this post.

First 17 Things – Gone!

Facts: I spent several hours today getting rid of stuff.  Here’s the rundown:

There’s a pile of clothes to be given to Goodwill, including:

• 3 sweaters
• 2 fleeces
• 1 vest
• 1 wrap
• 1 blazer
• 2 spring jackets
• 1 pea coat
• 1 crocheted shawl (no, I’m not a grandma!)
• 4 pairs of socks
• 1 bathing suit
• 1 pair running tights
• 3 beanie babies (I know these aren’t clothes, but Goodwill takes Tchotchkes!)
• 1 beaded necklace

I have two grocery sacks of books to be donated to the library book sale (must find out where these can be dropped off – I refuse to keep them in my house for an extended period of time!)

I threw away 2 items: a leather book dust cover, and a soap dish.  The soap dish was bright pink and teal.  I believe I’d had it since I was 13.  And that was oh, more than a few years ago.  So into the garbage it goes!

Analysis: This was kind of a sporadic purge.  I moved from one small area of my house, worked on a section, then moved to the next, etc, etc.  I didn’t concentrate on say, the linen closet, and completely purge that.  Which I think is fine, for now.  I’m at the point where there’s so much stuff to get rid of, wherever I look is something to toss.  So I just kinda willy nilly work my way through the rooms, stopping wherever I want and tossing stuff into bags.

I know I’ll have some hard decisions to make in the near future.  For example, in my closet is a leather purse I purchased in Italy a 2 years ago.  I didn’t pay much for it, and will get rid of it, probably in a day or two.  But, I had this distinct thought: “I can’t get rid of this, I bought it in Italy.”  Now, keep in mind these two things:

1. I don’t really like the purse – it doesn’t pass the “elbow” test, and while it’s Italian leather, it isn’t melt-in-your-mouth-soft-like-butter-leather.
2. Okay, only one thing.

But it’s a major thing: I don’t like it. The only reason I don’t want to get rid of it is because it’s a souvenir. I feel like since I bought it overseas it must be special and therefore I must keep it.  Which is crap.  Really, it is.  When I think of my trip, do I want to be reminded of a crappy purse I bought even though I kinda knew even then I didn’t like it, but really wanted an Italian leather purse?  No.  I want to think about my trip and remember the dark misty alleys of Venice, the sounds of the lapping canals against the boats, the echos of the singing nuns in St. Peter’s Basilica. That’s what I remember.  And I don’t need a purse to jog the memories, thank you very much!

On a similar, but slightly different note, the purse does something else whenever I see it.  It kinda brings me down just a little bit whenever I see it, thrown up on the top shelf of my closet.  I mentioned above that I bought it because I wanted a leather purse.  But I was a bit short of spending cash on that trip.  What I should have done was either just not gotten a bag, or straightened my shoulders and decided to screw the budget and go balls in a buy an expensive, but totally worthy, buttery soft bag.  Instead, I bought something I wasn’t totally happy with, just to buy something.  So now I’m stuck with a bag I don’t really want but am reluctant to get rid of because it came from Italy.  Well, kids, I’m over it.  As of now, I’m completely over it.  And I’ve learned my lesson:

Go big, or go home.

Meaning: if I’m going to buy something, make sure it’s the right thing.  Knowing myself as well as I do, I have a feeling I’m going to have to learn this lesson over, and over, and over.  And over again.

This is what I’m talking about people!

When I say “it’s not about the white sheets or futons on the floor”, this is what I mean:

When I first began my minimalist quest, I felt like I wasn’t “good enough” unless I conformed to what other people’s standards and definitions of minimalism were. When I decided that I didn’t really care about the physical number of things I owned, but rather about my attitude surrounding consumption, sustainability, and simple living, minimalism became a much more attainable and realistic goal.

Sometimes we get so caught up in the “rules”, that we forget the true heart of the matter, what really counts.

This was a comment made by Ann Marie (see her blog here) regarding a post on Courtney’s minimalist blog, BeMoreWithLess.  Courtney herself said this:

You might be a minimalist, or maybe you’re just happier living with less. Then again, what’s the difference?

In my version of minimalism, it’s not about the number of things you have.  It’s about your relationship with your things.  Do they rule you, or do you rule them?  Since I’m a girl and played princess when I was younger, you can bet your ass I want to be the one wearing the crown and holding the scepter.

Ground Control to Major Tom (aka: the Launching Pad)

Every river has a birthing place.  A place high in the mountains where it’s cold and snowy and I probably wouldn’t want to visit because I don’t like being cold and its early spring and I’m so sick of snow I can barely stand it!  (Wow – Freudian much?  Moving on…)  From that high mountain peak the water trickles down, becomes a rivlet, picks up speed, has some friends join it, and eventually becomes big enough to carry barges and tugboats, blah blah blah, we’ve all heard the analogy.  And like every river, every journey has a starting point.  My Journey (yup, with a capital J – I’m going emo today!) was birthed this past Monday.  I know – it’s kinda weird that I know the exact date.  But I do.  Maybe I’ll tell ya about it some day.  The idea hatched on Monday, and officially became a Journey with a capital J on Tuesday.  It’s the digital age kids, ideas move quickly!

Tuesday night I put some tchotchkes in a box.  This morning I cleared some counter space.  I plan on ditching some sweaters later this evening.

I know I said in this post that it’s not just about the physical stuff (although I believe my exact word was “shit.”)  And it’s not.  But everyone has to start somewhere, and the physical stuff is my starting spot.  For today.

Do I have any qualms about this part of the Journey?  You can bet your tchotchke loving ass I do!  Here’s but a few:

• I like color.  I like “pop”.  If I’m a minimalist does it mean I have to have white walls and no couch and only own one shirt?  ‘Cause if it does, I want no part of it!
• I change my mind a lot.  If I start down the minimalist road and get rid of a lot of my stuff will I regret it in 4 months and want it all back?
• Let’s say I pare my wardrobe down to 10 or 15 or 33 pieces.  That means doing laundry quite often.  I hate doing laundry.
• If I end up really liking this whole minimalist thing, what will people get me for Christmas?  Seriously.  This is one of my worries.  I know.  I’m shallow.  Either get over it or leave!

So, those are my worries.  Whew.  I feel better now.  Writing things down always makes me feel better.  Gets them out of my head.  Lightens my load.  (Maybe I’m a little more minimalist than I was 10 seconds ago because of this – woot!)  And looking at my little list actually kinda makes me feel better.  Those aren’t big things to over come:

• So I put a pink silk cover on my Japanese duvet instead of a white organic cotton one.  Big whoop.  And the single orchid on my mantle piece will be bright red, not white.  Still modern.  Still minimalist.  And to those who only like white, let me remind you of another person who only likes white: the Grand Dragon of the KKK! (okay, so that may have been a  little inappropriate, maybe I should take that out)
• Yup.  I might regret it.  Get over it and move on.  So I might have to buy a pot to replace one I donated to Goodwill.  If this is the biggest tragedy of this experiment, I’ll consider it a universal success.
• If I think about it, it’s not the doing the laundry I hate.  It’s the putting away of the laundry.  So, reducing the wardrobe would inherently help with this.  Less clothes = less clean laundry to put away!
• Seriously?  That’s what I’m worried about?  First of all, Christmas is 9 months away.  Secondly, in less than 45 seconds thought, I can come up with the following non-things to ask for for Christmas:
  • Massage subscription (gift certificate for weekly massage – not a magazine)
  • Delicious dinner at an amazing steak house
  • iTunes gift certificate
  • Voucher for fresh cut flowers weekly

That’s my starting point.  I don’t know what my end point is.  Don’t really care.  I’m cool with an open ended ticket.

It’s not about white walls or futons on the floor…

What is minimalism?  Or, really, what is minimalism as defined by yours truly?  I don’t have it neatly summed up yet, but here’s my working definition:

Minimalism: (n). From the Latin “to not have a lot shit*” To want what you have and have only what you want.  To be who you want, and want who you are.

My definition has nothing to do with white walls or futons on the floor.  Nothing to do with having only 100 things.  Or decluttering.  Or riding your fixie to work.  These things may come as a byproduct, they probably will (okay, probably not the 100 things if you sane by any measure!), but they are not the essence of minimalism.  At least in my view, at this point time.  At this point in my journey.

*Shit it this context refers to physical shit (aka “stuff”) as well as mental shit (aka “baggage”).

Starting Point

Everyone has a starting point.  And this is mine (because really, who’s else could it be?).

My idea for this blog is to chronicle my journey to my best self.  In a totally non-spiritual/new age/mystical/mumbo jumbo kind of way, of course!  Because I’m not really like that.  I’m a more meat and potatoes kind of girl.

I plan on starting in my physical world.  And go from there.  Who knows where I’ll end up?  At the very least, it should be an entertaining journey!